The Secret of How to Feel Supported at Home

Men just don’t seem to struggle with the same issues as women do even though we are doing identical jobs in the workplace.  However, despite how far we have come and the era of the 21st century, many home burdens continue to fall on women regardless of the fact that we work just as much as men outside of the house. 

Many of my clients come to me complaining that they don’t have enough support at home.  Husbands arrive home, often at the same time as wives, and particularly in Asian culture, the burden defaults to the female. After a long day of work, a husband may plop on the couch and begin watching HBO, not even thinking to ask about contributing to dinner preparation or the often tedious bedtime routine.  When husbands come home from work, they are too tired to do anything.  We, also, feel too tired to do anything.

Yet somehow, we power through and force ourselves to prepare a meal that may not bring us joy.  We fight with our toddler to get to bed as she dodges sleep with all kinds of clever tactics.  Tick tock goes the clock as we see our leisure time disappearing and soon forms the perfect set up for Netflix late into the night because we deserve it and need time to unwind.

And so burnout ensues.  And exhaustion.  And stress.

So what do we do?

We cannot control other people; this is a fact of life.  I know this fact can make us feel powerless, as though we have zero control.  However, the one place where we do have complete and utter control is within ourselves.  And that can be so powerful! 

When it comes to feeling supported at home, it is critical that we create systems that will work in our favor.  We can take charge and create the home design we desire.  We don’t need to try to force our spouses to do anything they don’t want to do because that doesn’t really work.  They’re tired as well.

The keys to feeling more supported at home are as follows:

1.    LET GO.  

We don’t need to have a perfectly spic and span instagrammable home.

We don’t need to have a home cooked meal every night.

We don’t need a 5 course meal every night.

2.    Outsource if possible

With childcare

With meal prep

With errands

With chores

With laundry

3.     Know you have your own back

You can be your own support system.

You have figured out a million challenges in the past and will continue to do so.

4.     Roll with the punches and easy does it

Life’s not perfect.

There are and always will be tough times.  

Your babysitter might quit.  

Your colleague may call out sick.  

Your car’s tire may go flat.

You may lose power during a storm.

       And the list goes on…

BUT you will get through it like you always have. 

And remembering this will give you a consistent sense of peace.

You got this. ALWAYS.  I promise.

If any of this resonates with you, book a free 30 minute consultation with me to get started on your own personal transformation to loving your life again.

https://priancanaikmdcoaching.as.me/