Manage Your Mind to Feel Better

Hello there everybody. Thank you so much for tuning in today. I feel like I am in an awesome mood because here in the Northeast it feels like spring is not that far away and the winter has been relatively mild. I've been connecting with some really interesting people and that has been really cool. I've had some great leisurely time with my children and yeah, things are wonderful, right now, not to say that things are perfect because they are not, because I'm human and nobody's, perfect. And there's always, you know, they're always challenges going on, but definitely a shift in my mindset and attitude through this hard work has really helped me to create this wonderful peaceful and fulfilling life.

Before we dive in, I want to let you know that enrollment is open for my group coaching program for professional moms who are mentally exhausted and want to enjoy life, that they work so hard for. So, book, a call with me, apply to work with me to get inside this robust awesome program. I have been working my tail off on it in the past couple of months and I'm super excited because group really provides this community for women to feel I like and know that they're not alone, www.priancanaikmdcoaching.as.me apply to work with me. I would love to talk to you see where you are. And if you're a good fit for this program, the link is in the show notes.

So today, I want to talk about being really picky about how we allow our brains to function and what we allow to take up space in our precious brains, all right. And a quote, that really has, had an impact on me in the past couple of years, given to me, by my own coach, is stand guard to the door of your mind, stand guard to the door of your mind. That is a quote by Jim Rohn. And I actually have that quote up on my bulletin board that I have sitting in front of my desk. And I have a bunch of posts on there and vision board type stuff, and quotes and sayings and that was actually on there for a good year.

I recently took it down because now I really live by it. I don't need a reminder but the concept of this quote is to truly have a sieve of the input that goes into your brain and being really particular about how you're allowing your brain to like what you're allowing it to focus on to indulge in and what you don't allow it to and this practice will truly free up so much energy for you, I guarantee it because we end up spending so much precious brain space and energy on things that just don't matter. On nonsense, obsessing over things that we have no control over or we spin out, you know, a lot of my clients, especially before they learn a lot of the tools that I teach, they will spin out, they won't practice mindfulness right before they come to me, and they'll be obsessing wasting brain space on narrative stories. What people think of them? It's interesting, because the other day, I was getting ready and I wanted to wear sequins. That's kind of been my modus operandi recently. And yeah, sequence is a little over the top one might say, right? I was meeting a couple of friends of mine and I thought to myself, who cares, what anyone thinks about the sequins on? It makes me happy. And instead of worrying about what people would think, giving all the brain space to it all the energy, I quickly made a decision to Don the sequence. I was totally happy in the sequence and I ended up having a great time, but the point of that is just not wasting moments of our precious lives our precious time and brain energy on things that just don't matter.

So, a lot of this work that I'm talking about in this episode is really about mine management and living our lives with intention. Like I talked about in one of my first episodes of this podcast but really being intentional with how we spend our brain, space energy, what we give are time to okay, because unless you become disciplined and really think about this, you will find yourself exhausted, and you might wonder why. And some of that exhaustion truly comes from wasting our precious, you know, thoughts and brain space and energy. And remember, honestly, a lot of people are not happy and there are so many people struggling and they're not satisfied. They're not enjoying their lives. So, we really have to think about doing something different than what we're doing or what maybe we've been taught and really train ourselves to be tight with how we expend our energy in order to find peace and fulfillment. And enjoy every day, you really have to implement this process and full disclosure, my son is running around and screaming. If you could hear him in the background, he's just being a four going on five-year-olds. I have a babysitter who's helping me so I can record this podcast but I'm actually just going to record this and get it out because I want you guys to hear it and done is better than perfect so I'm not going to drive myself crazy trying to find another time to record it because I really think that this is information that you're going to benefit from, but I do call the title of this podcast real talk because I am getting real talking to you about the realities of being a working mom.

What does it mean to stand guard to the door of the Mind truly?

Well, it means paying attention to who you're talking to what you're listening to or what you're consuming, who you're spending time with, how you're allowing yourself, to think, what you're allowing into your brain, what thoughts you're allowing yourself to indulge in and really becoming aware of all of these things and I think this is a list worth writing, down the who you're talking to, what you're listening to, who you're spending time with how you're allowing your brain to think, what thoughts, you're allowing yourself to indulge in, right being aware of these really can keep you disciplined with how you're spending and using that brain power. And that's really the issue, right? That with a full-time job even part-time. But when you're working, you are Mom, you have a partnership maybe and you're doing all the things, wearing all the hats, and there's just no energy to waste on things that don't matter. And also, just putting garbage content into our brains. So, for example, who you're talking to, sometimes, there are people who are draining and maybe there's somebody, you know, who is a friend, maybe not a friend. And they're always complaining to you 24/7, complaints and that's what you listen to because you want to be kind and compassionate, but there is a limit to how much negativity we can listen to. So, just really being mindful of where you are in your current state. And if you really have the bandwidth to listen and what are your boundaries with listening to, let's say, a negative person, negative talk and limits for yourself, really being paying attention to who your spent, who you are spending your time with, or even if you are trying to step into a different Identity or mindset than really thinking about surrounding yourself with people who are doing the same, and not sharing your dreams with people who might naysay, right? Because that's not helpful, and also certain people you may decide you don't want to talk to it all and that's okay.

That's what I'm saying. It's okay to do that as long as you do it with kindness and compassion, but you don't have to be a people pleaser. You don't have to sacrifice your well-being and put yourself in harm's way to be a good human being. So, what you're listening to, right? That means who you're listening to what you're listening to Whose advice are you taking? What podcast maybe are you listening to? Are they helpful? I know mine is so you're here listening, and I'm grateful for that. Let's say you're listening to the news all the time and it makes you feel sad. Maybe you need to take a break with that. If you're talking to somebody who wants to Poopoo, your dreams or tell you that, you know, oh, that's not going to happen and they're - maybe that's something that you want to consider and you don't want to tell that person about your dreams, etc. And this goes along with who you're spending time with. So, if let's say you have friends who gossip all the time and that's just not who you want to be or what you surround want to surround yourself with then you may want to reconsider. Are those the kinds of people that you want to hang out with also how are you allowing your brain to think as in what thoughts are you indulging in for example, thoughts, like I'm not good enough or I cannot do this or this is never going to happen or I'm not happy or any of those that perhaps are not serving us, right? So, we don't want to, we can acknowledge that those are thoughts. We can acknowledge that they exist but we don't have to marry ourselves to them. We don't have to indulge in them and give them our time and an excessive importance and room in our brains we can just see them for what they are and decide to not go down the rabbit hole with them, really consider what's helpful, what's not, where you want to go in your life, what kind of a person you want to be and create that sieve accordingly to really guard the mind because the person that we want to be, who we want to become the kind of life that we want?

We want our thoughts to line up with that, because really, it's our thinking that creates our experience of this life and all the negativity that we might think which, of course, we're going to think that's just how it is. We want to be mindful and not entertain them as much. And really having pause and presence and empowering ourselves to decide what thoughts were going to indulge what memories we want to focus on, what we want to give energy to or how we want to spend our energy, the more the more in tune with that that we become the more we can truly safeguard our energy and the less we're going to feel exhausted truly because the mental exhaustion comes from a lot of wasted brain spacious and energy on top of an already pretty full life.

And one more thing I will bring up is answering people's questions for people that you might not want to answer. So, if you find explaining something about your life, be at your job, or something personal and it's exhausting for you, then don't force yourself to do that for other people. You're allowed to decide what you want to talk about, right? And this was a really interesting and difficult concept for me to wrap my head around, because I think as are covering people pleaser, I would always worried that somebody's going. Going to be think I'm being abrasive or rude if I don't answer their question. I have to answer, I have to prove myself, I have to, you know, over-explain and I no longer do this. And I've been practicing when they're things and questions, people ask me. I have ideas in my head of what to say like a one or two sentence go to and that has actually worked out remarkably. Well for me, in fact, it was not a month ago. I think I went to a group dinner with about seven or eight women and somebody put me on the spot and ask me a really personal question that I did not feel comfortable getting into in front of this large group of women who many of whom, I don't know that well or some of whom, I don't know very well and I didn't really think that the question that was asked was anybody's business, really the answer to it. So, I had I paused So I have the presents and I pause I'm able to practice mindfulness. I went to my go-to sentence and I said it and it was totally fine. I don't think anyone thought I was rude and the dinner just moved on we didn't get into it because it would have been tiring for me and so just being able to have boundaries and safeguard your energy and what you're talking about and deciding whether or not you want to talk about something else totally okay, right? So, try some of these tips, try being mindful of what you're consuming. Who you're talking to what you're talking about, what? You're having your brain, say, your negative self-talk, and really pay attention and make an active decision as to how you want to spend your brain energy. Just like we decide how we're going to spend our time. Try any of these tips and let me know how it goes.

Enrollment is now open for my group coaching program for professional moms who are exhausted in survival mode and they just want to enjoy their lives because they freaking deserve to because they work so hard. So, book a call with me, www.priancanaikmdcoaching.as.me, I'd love to talk to you, see where you are and see, if you're a good fit for this program, thanks for tuning in and I will talk to you next week.

Thank you for listening to this episode of the empowering working moms podcast, real talk with dr. Priyanka Nayak, if you are ready to get unstuck and out of survival mode to live your best life, I want to invite you to book a free 30-minute consultation call with me to get started. Visit www.priancanaikmdcoaching.as.me  Link in the show notes.