Find Out Now, What Should You Do To Not Feel Overwhelmed?

“I’m so emotionally and physically exhausted.”
Does this line sound familiar to you?  

It does to me!

 So many times, after a long day at work or perhaps a spat with my spouse, I felt depleted.  Luckily, coaching handed me the epiphany that my life was not happening to me.  My circumstances do not dictate my life experience.  I do.  So that means that I have the power to decide how I’m going to spend my time and brain space.

For example, this past weekend, I was on call, working in New Jersey and Pennsylvania and supposed to drive home to New York, a 2 hour drive, on Sunday.  Meanwhile, a new babysitter was supposed to start helping me this week on Monday.  I envisioned having a detailed conversation with her regarding child care and household practices.  But what if I couldn’t be home Monday due to the broadcasted impending snow storm on Sunday?  How would I train her?  How would I coach my clients scheduled on Monday afternoon without childcare?  Would my mother-in-law have to stay an extra day to care for my son? 

As the thought tornado, beginning ever so slowly as a benign swirl, gained momentum, I swiftly stopped it in its tracks.  I allowed myself a few minutes to panic and then I made a conscious decision to put the worries aside-to compartmentalize them.  I would make more decisions once the snow storm actually hit.

After years of personal reflection and work, I finally trust myself to make sound decisions as tough situations arise instead of spending hours panicking and planning for uncertainty.  The time I used to spend planning was a waste of time, energy, and brain space.  When we plan, the universe often laughs at us.  Hey universe, the joke is on you-because I will deal with what comes-hour by hour, day by day and conserve my energy in regards to what I cannot control.

There is so much that we cannot control and yet so much we can.  We can control how we respond to crises, stressful situations, and life’s unexpected turns.  We can elect to deal with things as they happen.  We can choose to be optimistic about the future even if things don’t necessarily turn out the way we planned.  Because in the end, planning for the worst when it may not happen produces unnecessary angst and spoils our current experience.  

I challenge you to think of a few times when you planned for the worst and it never happened.  Pretty often, right?  This contemplation reveals the futility of time spent worrying.  If you hope for the best and a subpar or worse outcome transpires, then you will deal with it.  But at least you did not spend a prolonged period of time in a negative space.  In fact, you lived in joy for a bit, which was energizing for your psyche.  

 I used to plan, plan, and plan, thinking that practice was the antidote to stress and anxiety.  This was a sore misconception.  The more I reflect on my past, the more I gain confidence in making the right decisions as unexpected situations occur.  I have stopped planning far in advance and subsequently find my life to be much happier.

I hope you can take away a tidbit from this to apply in your life to get you one step closer to your desired life.