A personal story and what you should do for your mom anxiety

My throat would tighten and I would get that familiar lift in my stomach, similar to the one that accompanies the steep descent of a roller coaster ride, when something seemingly went wrong at work.  On the outside I maintained composure, while on the inside I was shriveling.  When daycare called with the news my son had a fever of 104 in January, time froze and I felt as though my body was melting into a pile of liquid mush, like a dirty puddle in a parking lot.  As I often did with difficult situations, I took immediate action and we found out he had the flu at his pediatrician’s office.  I was able to myself off the ledge.  He was going to survive.  The worse would not happen and the panic dissipated. 

Has this ever happened to you?

That feeling of doom appears with less frequency these days.  I attribute its decreased role in my life to letting it in and actually feeling it as opposed to trying to shove it deep down inside of myself.  Furthermore, I have learned to no longer loathe parts of myself.  I used to hate myself for not feeling calm and collected at all times.  Hate.  Can you believe that? How absurd.  Can human beings be centered and calm one hundred percent of the time?  

Steps in the right direction:

I've learned to take good care of myself as the days go on.  I am an avid exerciser, meditator, and recovering self-hater.  I acknowledge that stress and anxiety are part of the game.  They will always exist.  How I handle them has and will continue to change.  Knowing I can control my thoughts and, therefore, my feelings has empowered me to get a firm grip on my life.  I know no stressful situation will likely kill me.  I will persist.  I reflect on past stresses and recognize their inherent transient nature; this understanding enables me to no longer get sucked in to nonsense thereby wasting my time. 

Lastly, I am big on self-forgiveness these days.  I swear by it.  When old frenemies shame or regret creep in, along with that throat tightening, I notice them.  I give compassion to them and myself and tell myself it is okay.  I'm not perfect. There was a reason for what happened and guilt no longer burdens me.  The thing about life, as Robert Frost says, is that it goes on.  Knowing this, we must also go on and not linger in any given situation or emotion.  We observe, let it in, and move forward.  This practice tells our stress and anxiety to p#$$ off.  We learn to live with it and it us.  Good luck and keep on keeping on.